When I had my first job, I worked in Beverly Hills and didn’t have money to eat where a lot of my co-workers went, so sometimes I splurged and went to SP alone.
Now, I also wasn’t comfortable with eating at restaurants alone, but it usually seemed ok to be there by myself with a book.
One time, though, I was heading back to my table with some soup in one hand and some corn bread in the other, when I needed to sneeze. This was a big sneeze, but there wasn’t any place to put down my stuff until I got through the dining area and back to my table, so I held it back.
And this was when I farted as loud as I ever have before. I put the stuff down and ran outside. I was so horrified that I had no idea how funny this was until I told a friend the story later that day.